Last Sunday my mother and aunt accompanied me to the office of the Commission on Elections. I had not completed the final required step for their new rules on becoming a bonafide voter – getting the biometric stuff like face and fingerprint ID. We were met with a closed door with a sign indicating they’re temporarily holding office at some space in a local mall. We were walking towards the taxi stand and a disoriented feeling washed over me, particularly one that I am no stranger to witnessing and reflecting a lot of times.

I don’t belong here. I mostly don’t find my big career jumps or opportunities here. What the hell have I been staying here for too long?

I recall an incident back in elementary school – I think I was 8 or 9 years old – when I was having picnic lunch with the same aunt I was with last Sunday. “Your destiny is not here; it’s somewhere in a foreign place.” The years never erased her words in my memory especially when the heart recognized it to be true. What a not-so-surprising coincidence to get that sudden disorientation vibe at that point in time.

I did begin to doubt that the time may be soon for me to strike it out again in a foreign land as I wondered why I was recently imagining about family get-togethers. Later that day my mother would astonishingly run into a close high school friend that I have been avoiding communicating with for over a year. (I’ve changed a lot and people grow apart; I can’t just listen to baby stories and family drama the whole time I’m out with common friends. I’m sorry I can’t relate and not all women just want to have babies to identify their projected selves with.) I know my friend could read it in my face that I have changed and that I wasn’t looking forward to getting her new number. She did get mine though. Just a week ago I ran into 2 classmates from the university. If those aren’t enough signs to tell me something is up in my travel list then I don’t know what.

I have Ninth House in Taurus and a Moon in the Third House so I do love traveling. It’s just lately I’ve been very picky with my choices of where I want to go instead of being superficially swayed by others’ suggestions.

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