I’ve been preoccupied with thinking about how I’m more often thinking about being rather than being in the moment. I know this tendency of mine to overthink and the compulsion to anticipate and plan ahead too well. I wouldn’t see it as altogether a bad habit. It’s rather relative in the sense that all depends on timing yet most of the time I miss the “flexible” mark. But then, again, timing is tricky and subjective reflections are muddled. The only thing certain is uncertainty.

Wouldn’t it be nice to wake up with that realisation? I did. Very compelling yet the quick mind is not so attuned to the timid body. Doubt and fear creep in and I’m back in the fetal stage of suspended motion and indecisiveness. It hit me that I may have questioned myself about it less. When you’re used to succeeding at one thing and suddenly fail at it, you lose your bearings and forget how you got from one point to the next.

Or it could be just ego and pride. So proud, so confident in treading the waters of life…we think we will know or feel our way around the ocean of both familiar and unfamiliar circumstances that we forget the science of it – there is a way but not the one you dictated.

It’s either succumb to the flow of trial and error (ignorance is bliss) or find the logical pattern (knowledge is power).