This has been an intense week for me so far. I was faced again with the painful truth that I have been shielding myself from for a long time –  that I could escape what I’ve always known (as opposed to ‘believed’) and look elsewhere for other answers. This whole uncovering process now suddenly feels like I’ve been the one turning the knife inside of me all these years. 
 
It was pretty innocuous and benign at first. I thought observing my depression via memory recall and letting it pass through my consciousness was enough. I hadn’t even scratched the surface. For a few days I felt relief as I was working through my past self-denial. The tears came later as the truth became clearer – I cannot and should not ignore what my heart has known all along. 
 
While deleting some unimportant emails tonight, I came across this weekly angel reading for me for next week – Oct 24-Oct 30 from AngelVisionary.com.  

The most important part of this is about trusting in the signs that you receive from the angels and also trusting in yourself and your own inner knowledge. Raziel can help you to understand the symbols and spiritual truths that may be coming to you during meditation or whilst sleeping. Ask him for his assistance and he will enable you to bring the information into your awareness so you can better understand it.

Raziel is wonderful if you wish to understand ideas that defy normal logic. Listen to some calming music and ask for Archangel Raziel to be by your side. If there is anything in your life right now that you would like more clarity about, or that you may be confused about right now, ask for him to bring you through understanding about this. He can help to expand your everyday thinking, so that you can see situations from a fresh perspective. This is best done at night time, before sleeping as Raziel often communicates in the dream state and he can help you to learn knowledge and information during this time.

raziel

Normal logic and the esoteric nature of the message is exactly the originator of my compounding doubts. I don’t currently see any sign that what my heart has known for a long time is happening. Nada. Well, if anything, the circumstances show the opposite. This is where patience and faith play a mighty role in because trusting what you don’t see makes you go cuckoo. 

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