Category: Tarot

Following my preoccupation to examine my dreams more carefully this time, I encountered an old tarot reading I requested in 2014, the gist of which strangely seems more appropriate for what’s been happening in my life from the start of my first cycle (my birth month) this year until the present. The first line of the description of Sacred Earth Mother, one of the cards drawn, summarizes what I’ve been going through lately.




“We travel the endless corridors of our mind until one day we find a pathway that leads us to our heart.”


My heart felt light today. This must be what I am getting from working with mystic merlinite. I don’t understand how it can show me the depressing depths and something magickal at the same time. I don’t need to analyse at this point. Maybe I just felt the wheels are turning.

I entertained the thought that I am afraid I might miss the forest for the trees and that I am continually questioning everything solely because I am being realistic with my expectations. Tracing back my dream journal in 2014 made me realise how important it is to write down essential impressions and insights. There are no coincidences.


Thoth To Write

I have a vacant Tumblr account and I asked myself a while ago just what is the point of Tumblr anyway? A part of me instantly recognizes this to be a syndrome of an individual running around in circles but never traversing to the core or of an individual spreading their energies or projections separately spaced far too wide but never going to the crux of the matter. I think I just aptly describe the escapist part of me.

Since I’ve started the topic of writing, I couldn’t help but relate this bit. I’ve done random tarot readings with the Ascended Masters Oracle Cards by Doreen Virtue, Ph.D. the past few weeks and have always drawn the Thoth tarot card. This is the one thing I like about the Ascended Masters Oracle Cards – they’re so direct to the point. Age probably plays a factor in that over time I find it easier to connect with the messages of these cards more than I would with other tarot decks because my intuition has undergone a lot of fine-tuning.

© Ascended Masters Oracle Cards by Doreen Virtue, Ph.D.

I did listen and I wrote “channel-messages-from-your-guides-and-angels” kinds of epiphany on my journal. It left me in a confused state and my questions compounded since I started writing.

Maybe because I don’t know how to start, or maybe I’m not confident to be one of their earthly counterparts to tell others about them. Over the years I’ve joked to myself that my angel encounters made me doubt my sanity. Or is it the others that are insane?

So let’s see if I end up using my vacant Tumblr account for that purpose.


At some point I’ve developed an apathy to my own drama that I’d want to bang my head on the wall (but wouldn’t dare go to great lengths to literally do so). There’s no point in crying unless for catharsis; if it make us feel good to wail and sob, a reliever that helps vent out our anger at the world (oh, how unfair it is!) or at someone. I stop midway whenever I catch myself complaining and lamenting my discontent because the whole circumstance boomerangs back to me. No, it’s not being hard on myself, but rather it’s an illumined understanding of the universal laws we’re bound to.

I frustrate myself when I clearly see my disposition to despise an unpleasant situation I got myself in. When I had to go through almost a hundred times with one Candy Crush level, I know it reflects my poor problem-solving skills in life, always feeling like I’ve been at the end of my rope forever yet I perpetuate the aggravating problems myself by running around in circles. I know something has to change but disheartened how the risks are too great. And when I solve the difficult level? Ecstatic am I! But, wait, do I bask in this small success forever? It’s a trap because the challenges only get more and more difficult with each rung I surpass.

The disposition to despise subsequently brings me back to the center, back to focus. It’s a waste of energy to linger in it, though. Somehow The Hanged Man in the Tarot has to get himself unstuck.


Faux Pas

The Australian Aborigines were quoted innumerable times to hold a belief system that our dreams are as much a part of our reality as the stuff we consciously engage in in the waking world. I even plastered their quote in a header banner I made for my Blogger account on dreams:

When you sleep, you wake up to the real world
When you wake up in the morning, you really sleep
Every time we sleep, we enter the real world.

Well, that’s what today’s events felt like. As in a nocturnal dream, my day was spattered with layers and parallels of personally recognizable clues.

The realization all started with an embarrassing case of mistaken identity in KK this afternoon, a.k.a. Krispy Kreme. (My burgeoning hometown, by the way, has proven on November 16th this year that it could afford to invest in one of the prosperous doughnut franchises in the world. Yay! for CdO consumers.) My cousin and I had just sorted out a fund deposit problem with a telecommunications network (more on this later) and I had the unshakable craving to have coffee with a doughnut. I saw someone sitting outside KK who closely resembled my friend, Cons. She was sharing the table with 2 girl friends and for one fleeting moment I saw her glance at our direction. The clear glass wall made everyone outside pretty much transparent and to my dismay, she didn’t recognize me when she saw me. I told myself it was probably because of my short bob as I had just gotten rid of my long tresses yesterday.

The only feature I felt so uneasy about was the doppelganger’s mole right below the lower lip. Because her principal features were so convincingly strikingly similar to those of Cons – the eyeglasses, the long straight hair, the petite frame to the robust cheeks – I entertained inane rationalizations. Oh, it’s probably not a mole…it’s probably a minor facial wound of some sort. I sent a text message to Cons to be sure. I asked her if she was in KK at the moment. I didn’t see the girl outside pick up her phone and my friend had not replied. Against my better judgment, I went over to the glass wall and knocked on it to catch her attention and I realized my mistake when she gave me a quick blank stare. I also couldn’t help but compare that she has lifeless eyes; Cons’s appear to have more spunk in them. She replied after 5 or 6 minutes and she confirmed she was not in KK. Too late. My cousin and I were laughing at my own faux pas.

On our way home an arbitrary insight hovered in my head that dulled my impatience of the traffic ahead of us. I remember the Justice card drawn for me back in September with regards to Elk. I couldn’t fully rejoice on that “highest good” promised in that card. I’ve read before how the Justice card can have unpleasant and dragging repercussions because the truth does make one miserable at first before it can set us free. Not surprisingly this theme about Justice was present in one aspect in a composite chart I generated for Elk and I. I couldn’t forget how Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise also had that one aspect in their composite chart which later on manifested itself in divorce and custody battles. Relationships unexpectedly hitting rock bottom just like ours did get my ugly Martian qualities all worked up.

I can’t seem to pinpoint why it made me even nervous that the Hierophant also appeared before in a few tarot readings about Elk. I learned my lesson to each examine the Justice and the Hierophant cards separately because it was easy to be deceived by the similarities of the two cards at first glance. This combination ought to be positive, at least for me, but I don’t know why I still get a bad vibe about it. 

I know I did the right thing by attempting to send a text message to my friend first and it’s funny to think that I could not even wait 5 or 10 more minutes to at least confirm it with her. Appearances can be deceiving. Ironically, that issue with the fund deposit had apparently been resolved on November 30th. If I had only remembered to send a text message to inquire on the balance then we wouldn’t have bothered to go there in the first place, even though it was back in December 1st when we first attempted a follow up because a mere balance inquiry verified no funds came in that day. Strange.

On another note, I realized why I kept referring to Krispy Kreme as KK. KK contains Elk’s and the babymama’s initials. Sometimes coincidences like these make me feel like whatever path each of us take on, my (bad) memory will forever be karmically linked with theirs.

The irony is not lost on me, Cosmic.

Spark of Insight

In the middle of reading the description of a particular compatibility chart I was suddenly reminded of the Three of Pentacles. The reminder came like a cosmic prompt for me to examine the card closely. Come to think of it, I haven’t really examined the imagery of the card despite having encountered the card in 3 separate Tarot card readings when inquiring about a specific person (who was a Freemason) last week.


Image source: Biddy Tarot

So I was floored when I read from several online sources that the imagery for the Three of Pentacles involves a mason (I was laughing my arse off at this coincidence) and two monks. Generally it is a card about partnership, patience, and is a good omen indicating that careful planning and hard work will soon pay off.

I guess the Three of Pentacles was an offshoot of my observation on the composite chart I had mentioned in the first paragraph. Since I was so curious what role he had possibly played in one, if not few or more of my past lives, I decided to generate our Vedic and Western birth charts to come up with the composite chart. I was transfixed on the 4 or 5 houses in the composite chart occupied by Taurus and Venus in Libra. Somehow the solid presence of Taurus in the composite chart seems consistent with the 3 readings I’ve had about this Freemason – I did notice more Pentacles come up. The Suit of Pentacles, in a nutshell, are all about earthly concerns and material wealth, which coincidentally are also what Taurus and Libra (both signs are ruled by Venus) represent.

It’s interesting that both the cards and the charts had consistently spoken not only about partnership but also of its quality – that it will be a partnership that’s going to take time to build and form. Yeah, I do feel something life-altering is coming and I guess the cards have already insinuated what it is. I’ll let it take its course while I deal with pressing matters of the now.


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