Tag Archive: astrology


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I had my first experience with crystals on November 26th last year. Everything does happen for a reason as I never thought I’d actually be working with crystals in my lifetime. I was originally looking for crystals to aid in astral projection and that’s how I got to search for amethyst, sodalite, clear quartz, rainbow moonstone, lodestone and selenite on Etsy. As serendipity would have it, the amethyst and sodalite would arrive first because I ordered it from an Etsy shop owner located in Singapore while the rest of the stones mentioned had to be shipped from Florida.

Following my philosophy with listening to songs first before searching for the lyrics or not watching too much spoiler movie trailers before watching a movie, I preferred not to read much into the description of the crystals nor did I browse other blogs first about people’s experiences with stones before I could have a chance to experience them for myself. I get a lot of lucid dreams and dream trace and recall isn’t usually relatively difficult for me so I was ecstatic to sleep with both the amethyst and sodalite beside me.

I did have vivid dreams and there were a lot that I did not even bother to write them down because I felt they were the daytime thoughts purging type of dreams. I also experimented with sleeping with each crystal separately for a night. I noticed – without fail – that amethyst induces dreams about my family members and relatives and camaraderie. What came to mind was the connection between amethyst with Jupiter and how my Jupiter in Cancer is placed in the 11th house of my astrology chart. It’s curious how this combination of Jupiter being a benefic planet, Cancer being a family-oriented sign, and the 11th house being called the house of friendships was picked up by amethyst’s vibration.

Every person carries their own complex soul experiences with them but I’ll admit that I am not much of a “joyful friend” when it comes to my immediate family members. Being a life path 7, I pretty much love my solitude and keep to a few close friends. However, I consider my immediate family to be more of a big responsibility (breadwinner type) and less of a confidante of any sort. I do not feel guilty in this kind of detachment, this is just the way I am and I believe this is the way my karma is built around my family. I touched on a related topic in this blog called “The Mask I Could Not Give Up” and I do feel like I wear a different mask when I am around my close friends as when I’m around my blood relatives.

Working with the amethyst crystal during the daytime enabled me to have intuitive flashes, premonitions, and sudden insights. For some reason I couldn’t pin down, though, it did nothing to placate me emotionally.

Sodalite, on the other hand, works subtly as the amethyst. I noticed sodalite facilitates me most with my communication patterns and being able to express my ideas.

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I have been watching Breaking Bad episodes for over a week right after I finished Fringe. In the middle of watching Season 3, it suddenly occurred to me earlier today that the only two guys I had slept with had both dealt with drug problems in the past.

I find it a curious observation and couldn’t help but think of the 12th house, which is the house of the unconscious, mental institution, hospitals, prisons, etc. Just as I had no idea (so aptly named the House of The Unconscious) what drew me to those men in the first place, I am in the dark about the role I play with the common denominators and parallels they have. Of course I am not ignorant to the fact that this shadow play all comes back to me.

To mention a few parallels – both were from Commonwealth countries. Both live in cities which had a famous harbor (very Neptunian/Piscean) nearby. The first meetings involved the first ex visiting me in my home country whereas I visited the home country of the second ex. On another theme-related incident, I have been recently having dreams about watching the waves in the ocean or submerging myself in a pool of water. In my previous post, The Cloud of The Six, I did touch on the topic of Pisces.

The 12th house in Astrology is ruled by Jupiter/Neptune, it being the natural domain of Pisces. The sign Leo occupies it with two other neighbors, Rahu and Saturn. It’s also curious that in Vedic astrology I have the nakshatra Purva Phalguni in that house.

Faux Pas

The Australian Aborigines were quoted innumerable times to hold a belief system that our dreams are as much a part of our reality as the stuff we consciously engage in in the waking world. I even plastered their quote in a header banner I made for my Blogger account on dreams:

When you sleep, you wake up to the real world
When you wake up in the morning, you really sleep
Every time we sleep, we enter the real world.

Well, that’s what today’s events felt like. As in a nocturnal dream, my day was spattered with layers and parallels of personally recognizable clues.

The realization all started with an embarrassing case of mistaken identity in KK this afternoon, a.k.a. Krispy Kreme. (My burgeoning hometown, by the way, has proven on November 16th this year that it could afford to invest in one of the prosperous doughnut franchises in the world. Yay! for CdO consumers.) My cousin and I had just sorted out a fund deposit problem with a telecommunications network (more on this later) and I had the unshakable craving to have coffee with a doughnut. I saw someone sitting outside KK who closely resembled my friend, Cons. She was sharing the table with 2 girl friends and for one fleeting moment I saw her glance at our direction. The clear glass wall made everyone outside pretty much transparent and to my dismay, she didn’t recognize me when she saw me. I told myself it was probably because of my short bob as I had just gotten rid of my long tresses yesterday.

The only feature I felt so uneasy about was the doppelganger’s mole right below the lower lip. Because her principal features were so convincingly strikingly similar to those of Cons – the eyeglasses, the long straight hair, the petite frame to the robust cheeks – I entertained inane rationalizations. Oh, it’s probably not a mole…it’s probably a minor facial wound of some sort. I sent a text message to Cons to be sure. I asked her if she was in KK at the moment. I didn’t see the girl outside pick up her phone and my friend had not replied. Against my better judgment, I went over to the glass wall and knocked on it to catch her attention and I realized my mistake when she gave me a quick blank stare. I also couldn’t help but compare that she has lifeless eyes; Cons’s appear to have more spunk in them. She replied after 5 or 6 minutes and she confirmed she was not in KK. Too late. My cousin and I were laughing at my own faux pas.

On our way home an arbitrary insight hovered in my head that dulled my impatience of the traffic ahead of us. I remember the Justice card drawn for me back in September with regards to Elk. I couldn’t fully rejoice on that “highest good” promised in that card. I’ve read before how the Justice card can have unpleasant and dragging repercussions because the truth does make one miserable at first before it can set us free. Not surprisingly this theme about Justice was present in one aspect in a composite chart I generated for Elk and I. I couldn’t forget how Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise also had that one aspect in their composite chart which later on manifested itself in divorce and custody battles. Relationships unexpectedly hitting rock bottom just like ours did get my ugly Martian qualities all worked up.

I can’t seem to pinpoint why it made me even nervous that the Hierophant also appeared before in a few tarot readings about Elk. I learned my lesson to each examine the Justice and the Hierophant cards separately because it was easy to be deceived by the similarities of the two cards at first glance. This combination ought to be positive, at least for me, but I don’t know why I still get a bad vibe about it. 

I know I did the right thing by attempting to send a text message to my friend first and it’s funny to think that I could not even wait 5 or 10 more minutes to at least confirm it with her. Appearances can be deceiving. Ironically, that issue with the fund deposit had apparently been resolved on November 30th. If I had only remembered to send a text message to inquire on the balance then we wouldn’t have bothered to go there in the first place, even though it was back in December 1st when we first attempted a follow up because a mere balance inquiry verified no funds came in that day. Strange.

On another note, I realized why I kept referring to Krispy Kreme as KK. KK contains Elk’s and the babymama’s initials. Sometimes coincidences like these make me feel like whatever path each of us take on, my (bad) memory will forever be karmically linked with theirs.

The irony is not lost on me, Cosmic.

Guilty

When a series of thoughts and events start to amass in my head I get this urge to do some purging  – that way I clear my head space and allow newer ruminations to float in there. Writing affords me this so-called purging.

Two days ago I had submitted myself to a little pondering on this widening-my-perspective question: What if I wasn’t too picky and the possibility of getting with XX was something I wasn’t so conflicted with? My eyes widened because I was startled at my own audacious proposition. Well, it’s not impossible really. But if I break down the implications of this tiny seed of thought, I actually hear a lot of contradictory voices.

My high school and college friends say I’m picky. But most of them are boring – more often than not they take what life gives them. I have specific visions of what I want in some areas of my life and I did reach some of them by being patient. Most of them rarely rely on visualization to work and so they take on what’s convenient for them. So really, being labeled ‘picky’ actually means I had more specific visions and do not really want to settle for less. That’s somehow an inconvenient truth to explain to them and I didn’t try to explain it to them for years because I believe we each have a spiritual responsibility to figure out our own truths and befriend our selves more.

And what do you know, the day after I had that bizarre what-if, I get a short message from XX who was once a special friend. It was basically a short “hope-you-and-your-family-are-safe-from-the-typhoon” note, to which I of course replied with a short thank you note stating I and my family are safe as our area was not affected. Although the stressed phrase of “just a short note” irked me because I was reading it as “It’s a short note and I really don’t want to chat”, it was heartwarming nonetheless. I really mean heartwarming as an understatement because I cannot deny how that short message brought back sexual undertones due to a strong Sun-Venus and Eighth House synastry aspects we have in our composition chart. So, yes, I can boldly admit I am sexually attracted to him. Sadly, because it’s the only strong aspect, it’s also not a very binding and lasting one. It makes me feel guilty that somehow it’s hard to look beyond sexual attraction with XX even though he is a really good guy and does not have a cheater history.

It’s disappointing, isn’t it? But you see, I am glad we are talking sporadically these days. We can both be picky and miss out on each other for very good reasons. In my heart I don’t actually feel he’s the one. It goes without saying it’s mutual on his part and it’s a good thing we both don’t have hangups about it.

By the end of my pondering, I had actually thought that if I already had a vision of my ideal, then it must exist.

I’m not picky, I just know I deserve something better.

Spark of Insight

In the middle of reading the description of a particular compatibility chart I was suddenly reminded of the Three of Pentacles. The reminder came like a cosmic prompt for me to examine the card closely. Come to think of it, I haven’t really examined the imagery of the card despite having encountered the card in 3 separate Tarot card readings when inquiring about a specific person (who was a Freemason) last week.

three_pentacles

Image source: Biddy Tarot

So I was floored when I read from several online sources that the imagery for the Three of Pentacles involves a mason (I was laughing my arse off at this coincidence) and two monks. Generally it is a card about partnership, patience, and is a good omen indicating that careful planning and hard work will soon pay off.

I guess the Three of Pentacles was an offshoot of my observation on the composite chart I had mentioned in the first paragraph. Since I was so curious what role he had possibly played in one, if not few or more of my past lives, I decided to generate our Vedic and Western birth charts to come up with the composite chart. I was transfixed on the 4 or 5 houses in the composite chart occupied by Taurus and Venus in Libra. Somehow the solid presence of Taurus in the composite chart seems consistent with the 3 readings I’ve had about this Freemason – I did notice more Pentacles come up. The Suit of Pentacles, in a nutshell, are all about earthly concerns and material wealth, which coincidentally are also what Taurus and Libra (both signs are ruled by Venus) represent.

It’s interesting that both the cards and the charts had consistently spoken not only about partnership but also of its quality – that it will be a partnership that’s going to take time to build and form. Yeah, I do feel something life-altering is coming and I guess the cards have already insinuated what it is. I’ll let it take its course while I deal with pressing matters of the now.

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